Congratulations on your sobriety, how long has it been now?
Thank you for asking me to be a part of your awesome journey! I am 4+ years sober and proudly recovering out loud in the hopes to help others.
What motivated you to seek help and enter recovery?
Well, I'm fiddy nine (aka: 59yrs young lol) about to turn "sexty" (aka: 60 yrs young lol) and I was a high functioning alcoholic to say the least! I learned from the best (my dad) and I came from a generation that did not talk about these things nor any mental health topics. So, to say I lived with this disease of addiction for a long time would be correct considering it is a kind of 'whack a mole' behaviour ie: food, love, sex, shopping, work, etc can all become your DOC (drug of choice) at any given time! So basically, 4+ years ago my family came to me and said they wanted to do an intervention and I stopped them in their tracks! They expected to hear a big fat F*** Y** (because that's what you would normally hear from someone who's not ready), but instead I said, "Please take care of my boys & animals and I'll go! I was looking at 800's numbers for help lately, but I was SO ASHAMED, I couldn't bear calling and admitting I had a problem... " 3 days later, I was off to an intensive inpatient 30 day program w/no phones, nor computers, ect! To this day, I describe that day as one of the scariest days of my life and the beginning of my rebirth-day.
Can you share some of the most valuable lessons or insights you gained during your recovery process?
Oh man! There are many LOL! Let's start with this one that I still have to remind myself of... 1. Stay in your own lane! 2. You 'have' a story... you are 'not' your story! And my favorite one: 3. When you are active in your disease you are "The Identified Problem", but the day you start your journey in recovery? You become "The Identified Possibility!" I know this one is deep, but let that settle into your soul and it's powerful.
What strategies or tools did you learn in rehab that have been particularly helpful for you in maintaining your sobriety?
One of the most important tools I learned was the importance of having some kind of support or community! It usually comes in the form of another sober person or people, but no matter who or where you find it (in person, online, meetings, or even a text chat group, which is what I've leaned on now for years. There are these 3 people from my rehab that we STILL text in our group chat every day to just let each other know that we are not alone on this journey. We even named our group chat "The Mighty Fucks" LOL!!! Because we are.
How has your life changed since you began your recovery journey?
The fact I say I've experienced a rebirth the day I started my journey in recovery says it all! Just like a newborn learns to walk, someone in recovery learns how to strengthen their sober legs is what I call it! The change in the way I think, feel, and now behave from before, is night and day! My heart is filled with so much light, love, and no fear and this came from my sobriety! It's also given me the insight as to why I'm here in this body in this lifetime! And it's NOT about slowly dying in my earth body like I was before while I was in my disease, but rather doing light-work and showing others that their life is worth living too... Just be and they will follow the wise ones say! What role has your support system (family, friends, support groups) played in your recovery? It's ALL about your support systems when you start your rebirth! Just like adults help babies when they first start to walk? Early recovery is SO important, so I say if you are around a person or people that are rubbing you the wrong way, you can use that as an excuse to relapse OR an excuse to take your recovery by the balls and find other people who are more in harmony with your energy. An example is not everyone has the same GOD, so if that's not your thing, then search out others who are spiritual or are using a more clinical modality like CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy), etc. I'll add that my family were great because they knew they didn't understand what I was going through because they were what I call "Normies'' (aka: no addiction) and so they just said we love you, have no idea what you're going through, and if there's anything I can do to ever help you, please tell me what that looks like... It truly is the best way to support someone is to tell them you love them, are not going to try to pretend to even know what it's like to be going through what you're going through, but are there for them if needed.
Are there any specific challenges or triggers you've encountered in your daily life, and how have you learned to cope with them?
The world is attacking itself with all these wars, people hurting each other, people hurting animals and the disregard for our planet are all big ones for me... I'm not going to lie that all these things didn't bother me to no end before when I was drinking and active in my disease and drinking and smoking cigarettes were a way to try to escape the feelings of helplessness I felt all the time. AND, my first sponsor said something to me that I keep close to my heart as a reminder of a truth... If all these injustices in the world are eating you alive and you're thinking of relapsing because of them? Think twice because the world needs you NOW more than ever AWAKE, STRONG, ALERT, EMPOWERED, and READY to go out there and be part of the solution, not the problem! I was like, Damn! If that ain't the truth!!! We have choices and it's important to be mindful of when our authentic self is making the choice for you or your addict... again deep I know LOL!
What advice would you give to someone who is considering entering a recovery program or has recently started their journey to sobriety?
I know they say "trust the process". I used to hate that LOL! Yet, they are speaking the truth because think of it this way... Why would anyone lie about that? Have faith in the process. I just want to say I understand how difficult this is and remember it's hard because you can't "SEE' the process and faith works best in the dark! And the best part is, a new life is waiting for you if you can just learn to breathe and be in the moment because I'm here to tell you it WILL get better! Again, why would I lie about that? LOL!
How do you plan to maintain your sobriety in the long term, and what are your goals for the future?
Oh that's easy! Giving back to others in any way that feels right is one of the gems in recovery because it's a 2fer!
